mommy club around here. Mothers are hard to meet. For me it's harder to make friends with a mother than it was to ask a guy out on a date. Sweaty palms, fluttering heart, inappropriate comments coming out of my mouth - all signs of nervousness. But I gotta do it.
Do any of my friends want to hear about Alex's latest tooth, or give me advice about how to handle eating problems? Nope, not at all. And do I really want to hear about the latest drunken escapades? No, not really - it's hard hanging on to friends when you have moved into a different place emotionally. Not to mention that now that I live in Ipswich I might as well live in Kansas for the amount of visits I get from friends - not that I was ever Ms. Popularity, now that I think about it. Oh, I get the obligatory once a week phone call that usually occurs as I am putting Alex down for a nap so I don't get to the phone, and then I can hear 'you never answer your phone' - right. Cause it is ringing off the hook, folks.
How deep are my friendships? When you tell a friend about something scary that is happening in your life, don't you expect them to check back in with you, find out how you are doing? That is what I would think, anyway. When I was part of an online mother's forum, those ladies that I had never met in person knew more about me and my life than friends that I have had for 10 years.
So I guess when you get married and have a kid, you really begin to understand the levels of friendship that were not apparent before. There are people who are truly interested whether or not they can relate personally, those who pretend to be interested but at least make the effort to pretend, and those that pretend that nothing's changed.
Don't get me wrong, I know we're all busy, working, going out, whatever - but a true friend takes the time to follow up. This could also be said to me - but I really only give what I get these days. And I suppose that isn't much in either direction.
Whatever - I'm lonely, and I have nobody to talk to. It's too hot to play outside.
Unlocked
3 years ago
4 comments:
I could have written this entry. Even now, my old friends have had kids but they're "too busy" to call or even freakin' email. It's hard not to take it personally when they blow you off but this time, you actually KNOW the kind of stuff they're doing. So you think "How is it that I can make time for you but you can't make time for me?"
Anyway, that's what it's like for me. I just kind of got used to not hanging out with people anymore.
Thanks for stopping by, by the way!
making friends and taking the time to keep them is a lot of work. I only have really 2-3 myself. I hope you find a friend. you are awesome. If i lived there i'd be your friend. And i Don't get drunk either so that's one think going for me.
Love this blog entry, it speaks volume and screams the truth!!! Very witty!!
We miss you on the KC. You wouldn't be lonely with us again.
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