WTF

Somebody recently asked me how often I vacuum the inside of my couch. What the fuck? Why would I do something asinine like that? If NOTHING else, that is my go-to place for change and pens. Where would I store my quarters and barrettes and small toys? And why the hell would I waste precious time out of my life vacuuming something that never ever sees the light of day?
Now, don't get me wrong - I'm not a total slob. I'm maybe 35% slob. (which has decreased from like 60% slob 4 years ago) But seriously, what a colossal waste of time. That, in my mind, is akin to washing walls (walls - why??) on a regular basis, or cleaning underneath my obnoxiously heavy couch.
I should also mention that my son has a pathological fear of the vacuum cleaner, and my dog is convinced it is something that needs to be torn to bloody shreds of rubber and plastic. It's really a big ordeal that involves getting everyone out of the house to avoid major trauma.
I can live with 35% slob - if you can't, then don't come to my house. But look at it this way: I am spending 25% more of my time doing other, less menial things than a 10%-er. I have more fun than really clean people, in other words.