Monday - BAHHHHH

Why do Mondays suck so bad? They suck almost as bad as Sundays. I hate Sundays too - they're depressing, and I can't figure out why. Last night I was ready for the weekend to be over by dinner time, ready for my week to start. That doesn't make any sense to me. I can't seem to enjoy myself in the moment, I'm always thinking - whether it's dread or excitment - about what is coming. Such a waste.
Anyway, today Alex and I are going to walk to the supermarket and I have decided I am going to perfect making Chicken Marsala this week. If I have to make this shit 5 times, I am going to - I need a specialty. We'll probaby go and check out the cool kids fountain at Bradley Palmer later on, I want to organize our bedroom today... in other words, I'm not really doing anything today.
I had a dream the other night that I had graduated from Veterinary School and gotten a job I was really excited about, and I woke up bummed out. It's odd little glimpses into my subconscious like this that makes me wonder when I am going to freak out at the lack of personal direction my life has. Maybe I won't - who knows. I love staying home with Alex, I feel lucky - both that I get to raise him personally rather than partially by proxy, and that I just don't have to get up and go to work. There is no time like summer to be psyched I don't have to wrestle my thighs into dressy clothes and go sit behind a desk all day, other than fall and winter and spring that is.
It's just that my brain is getting bored. And I do not care what anyone says, toddlers - aside from being cute and fun - are pretty intellectually boring. Yeah yeah yeah, discovering new things, viewing the world through the eyes of a child - that shit is lovely. We all know that. However it doesn't replace an adult's need for adult pursuits, unfettered by diaper bags and nap times. So we'll see. If I weren't so goddamned lazy I'd write, or do something creative that I absolutely have time for.
But I am, so instead I'll organize closets and watch time slip by so quickly...
Mondays suck.